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The No Pants Manifesto

I don't much care for orange-flavoured things, touching raw poultry or wearing pants. I do, however, have a taste for whiskey, weed, playing guitar, making out with people who play guitar, beautiful girls/boys, blow jobs, motor-boating, clouds, love & not wearing pants.
Nov 30 '12
I woke up at 4:00 am. My body keeps forgetting that I’m unemployed and wakes me up early without fail. But 4 am?! That’s fucking ridiculous. 

I’m concerned I’m becoming immune to drugs. I have enough weed, painkillers & gravol in me that I should sleep all day. 
But no, instead I’m laying in bed on a hearing pad, watching horrible tv, waiting for that magical break in discomfort so that maybe I can get some more sleep. 

I’m incapable of finding a silver lining right now. It’s too early. 

Happy fucking Friday.

I woke up at 4:00 am. My body keeps forgetting that I’m unemployed and wakes me up early without fail. But 4 am?! That’s fucking ridiculous.

I’m concerned I’m becoming immune to drugs. I have enough weed, painkillers & gravol in me that I should sleep all day.
But no, instead I’m laying in bed on a hearing pad, watching horrible tv, waiting for that magical break in discomfort so that maybe I can get some more sleep.

I’m incapable of finding a silver lining right now. It’s too early.

Happy fucking Friday.

Nov 26 '12
Tags: GPOY
Nov 25 '12
Check it out! I have so much hair that it’s messy! This is new. Also turns out I have a couple cowlicks. It’s hard to tell from this pic but it looks like I’m either going to have grey or light blonde steaks on each side of my head. Which might be sexy as fuck if you ask me. 

In other news, I found out on Friday that I’m going to need some radiation. Heading to the big city for my appointment on Tuesday. Just an over night trip. Going to stay with my brother & thankfully a good friend took the day off to fly there & back with me (I hate flying).

I don’t know much right now but I do know this means relocating to Edmonton for anywhere from 3 to 8 weeks. They want to start in a couple weeks but I’m going to make them hold off till at least Dec 15. I’m not going anywhere till I see my kiddo off on her big adventure. She’s spending 3 weeks traveling to L.A, Vegas & New Mexico over xmas/new years. She’s meeting 2 Internet friends who she’s known for 6+ years & spending the holidays with them & their families. I’m so excited for her. 

So yeah.  5 weeks after my surgery everything is crazy again. C’est la vie, right? I’m not sure if I’ll ever really get used to not knowing what’s going on.

Check it out! I have so much hair that it’s messy! This is new. Also turns out I have a couple cowlicks. It’s hard to tell from this pic but it looks like I’m either going to have grey or light blonde steaks on each side of my head. Which might be sexy as fuck if you ask me.

In other news, I found out on Friday that I’m going to need some radiation. Heading to the big city for my appointment on Tuesday. Just an over night trip. Going to stay with my brother & thankfully a good friend took the day off to fly there & back with me (I hate flying).

I don’t know much right now but I do know this means relocating to Edmonton for anywhere from 3 to 8 weeks. They want to start in a couple weeks but I’m going to make them hold off till at least Dec 15. I’m not going anywhere till I see my kiddo off on her big adventure. She’s spending 3 weeks traveling to L.A, Vegas & New Mexico over xmas/new years. She’s meeting 2 Internet friends who she’s known for 6+ years & spending the holidays with them & their families. I’m so excited for her.

So yeah. 5 weeks after my surgery everything is crazy again. C’est la vie, right? I’m not sure if I’ll ever really get used to not knowing what’s going on.

Nov 25 '12

mandynopants:

I’m really proud of this music video. Sorry for the re-post, but GAWDAMN am I ever proud of the team that created this for me. In 48 hours, myself and 3 lovely french folks I had never met before came up with the winning entry in the music video contest we were a part of. Seriously, one of the most terrifying and gratifying things I’ve ever done. 

The song is all me, but this video belongs to them. <3

Nov 25 '12
Love this.

Love this.

(Source: handofd00m)

Nov 23 '12

Is it just me, or does Chris Angel look kind of like a young Warren Beatty?

Nov 22 '12
Having a hysterectomy &amp; starting estrogen replacement means two things. # 1. Possible side effects include increase in breast size. (i.e. BOOBS!!)# 2. 100% free, 100% reliable birth control for life.

Having a hysterectomy & starting estrogen replacement means two things.

# 1. Possible side effects include increase in breast size. (i.e. BOOBS!!)

# 2. 100% free, 100% reliable birth control for life.

Nov 22 '12
This is from a super fun night from couple years ago. My friend threw an &#8220;Internet meme&#8221; theme party. I&#8217;m the blonde.  You can&#8217;t see in this picture, but my Internet Meme costume was &#8220;complete double rainbow&#8221;. I have electrical tape &amp; a rainbow sticker on each nipple. When people asked where my costume was I flashed them my tits. It was one of my better ideas, I gotta say. 

I love that I know the kind of people who break out in spontaneous party pyramids. 

Also, it just occurred to me that I totally got laid the night this pic was taken. Spent the night with an endearingly shy &amp; sexy musician acquaintance of mine. 

Such a fun night.

This is from a super fun night from couple years ago. My friend threw an “Internet meme” theme party. I’m the blonde. You can’t see in this picture, but my Internet Meme costume was “complete double rainbow”. I have electrical tape & a rainbow sticker on each nipple. When people asked where my costume was I flashed them my tits. It was one of my better ideas, I gotta say.

I love that I know the kind of people who break out in spontaneous party pyramids.

Also, it just occurred to me that I totally got laid the night this pic was taken. Spent the night with an endearingly shy & sexy musician acquaintance of mine.

Such a fun night.

Nov 17 '12
Smoke em if you got em.

Smoke em if you got em.

Nov 17 '12

Conversations with my Daughter

Me: Did you hear about that “Oz the Great & Powerful” movie? It’s a Wizard of Oz prequel with James Franco as Oz.

Spawn: ARRarggh! I HATE James Franco!!!

Me: Woah! Why all the hate?

Spawn: He played James Dean in a horrible documentary in 2001 and it made me hate him. If I could remove anyone from history it would be him. Even over Hitler.

Me: Dude. Listen to what you just said. You’d take the Holocaust over a bad movie.

Spawn: At least the world learned something from all the horrible things Hitler did. The same cannot be said about James Franco

Me: Wow. You’re intense.